Time to hunt

It's 6:15 and I have been sucked into Twilight Clue for hours, Emmett was linked wrong blah blah blah. So now comes the dilemma: do I make dinner or order dinner? I'm always up for ordering, saves me time... time I could be spending reading blogs and or playing clue. But the wife has been on my ass about my spending and lack of interest in anything non-twilight related (I don't see the problem but she has been muttering things like "needs help"). So in the interest of saving myself from yet another twilight related argument I have decided to make dinner. I have challenged myself to make dinner (and not just microwave burritos) in 15 minutes. This will be the first TwiCuisine (be gentile with me I've never done this before. Ha haven't said that since.. well nevermind when that was).

First things first you must have a George Foreman grill and microwavable brown rice otherwise it will take longer than 15 minutes.

Shopping List:

1 13.6 oz Bottle teriyaki sauce

2 Boneless skinless chicken breasts

2 c. Broccoli crowns (go ahead and buy the frozen if you want)

1 Small can crushed pineapple

Fresh ginger or ginger paste (you can find it in to produce department)

Red chili flakes

1 Bag shredded carrots (why not save a step?)

Microwaveable brown rice (You can find it at Trader Joe's and Costco)

Garnishes (optional):

Green onions

Black and white sesame seeds

15 minute Chicken Teriyaki

Feeds 2 hungry adults

Ingredients:

2 boneless skinless chicken breasts
1/2 a 13.6 oz bottle teriyaki sauce
1/2 c. crushed pineapple
1/2 Tbs. grated ginger

1/2-1 Tbs. red chili flakes optional if you like it spicy
2 c. broccoli crowns

1/2 c. shredded carrots

2 bowls microwavable brown rice
salt and pepper

Garnishes if you want to make it fancy:
2 green onions sliced
back and white sesame seeds

Directions:

1. Plug in Foreman grill. Place teriyaki sauce, pineapple, ginger and red pepper flakes (optional) in a small sauce pan over med-high heat until it boils then reduce to a simmer stirring occasional.

2. Salt and pepper chicken then place on grill and cook for 7-10 minutes. While chicken is cooking place broccoli in a microwave safe bowl with 1/2 c. water and cook on high for 2-4 minutes or until tender then drain.

3. Cook brown rice according to package instructions.

4. Slice cooked chicken.

5. Pour cooked rice onto a plate add chicken and broccoli, top with teriyaki sauce, carrots, and optional garnishes.

It only took 14 minutes!! Now I can go back to twilight clue!!

Enjoy!

Because only Vampires don't have to cook

Once upon a time I used to cook dinner. I used to take the time to make treats for my wife's work buddies (they are disgruntled now and give me dirty looks). I used to have dinner parties and make beautiful pastries (I used to be a pastry chef), and then I met Edward Cullen. It was all down hill from there. I stopped cooking all together. Dinner consisted of:
A. Whatever wasn't molded over/freezer burnt
B. PB&J's
C. Take out (Option C always my favorite I would like to thank the lovely people of Thailand for their tasty fair)

Last night when I was making dinner for my client (I am now a caregiver) I started feeling guilty. Here I am making dinner for this person (Although I am getting paid to do it) when I won't take the time to slap something together for my wife. That's when I had a little idea. TwiCuisine. Yes that's right recipes for the very busy TwiHards.

Are you just to swamped with new TwiNews to bother with dinner? Just can't put down eclipse to feed the "starving" S/O? (lets hope you still have time to feed the pets) Then TwiCuisine is just for you! Recipes that take little time and effort (Because honestly twilight requires your full attention) on you part to pull together, so your family know you still care.

If Bella (yes I am referring to a fictional character and you know you do it too) could make dinner while Edward was around, and we all know how distracting he can be. I think there might be hope for us yet.

Most of all we love our families and we wouldn't want them to "starve" to death (My wife is melodramatic). They have stood by us in our darkest twilight hours and all of our drooling over Robward. Don't they deserve dinner?

I'm going to try to post at least one TwiCuisine a week (I don't feel guilty enough to cook everyday). Don't hold me to it, I do have a life away from the computer (little as it may be) and of course shit happens. In the posts I will include a shopping list, step by step instructions, and maybe a picture or two.

I hope this wins you some points with the S/O and or the kids.

I can't put my book down either.

Out of the loop

How did I not know about the upcoming Vampire baseball game that will be taking place in Portland Oregon? No really how did this slip by? I mean I live in Portland.

So I was just doing my thing looking at Simply Twilight , planing how I was going to dominate the twilight clue game (yeah I should be working. But that's another blog all together). When I see an add for "Vampire Baseball" to be held in of all places Portland Oregon. Now I want to go, I want to go bad! But it's on July 4th and we have plans. Plans with family (boo). So now how do I get out of said plans? Knowing all to well if I try to cancel my sister is going to throw a shit fit. Worse if she finds out I am canceling for something twilight related. Then there is the matter of the wife. She puts up with a lot of my twilight obsession (she wasn't to happy when told her she needed to be more like Edward. Her friends at work made fun of her when she said she started opening car doors and such. Her response? "Forever is a long time to go without sex." Classic), but I don't know how kindly she will react if I ask her to shell out $135 apiece for tickets. It is going to a good cause, Oregon's Make a Wish foundation. So maybe if I play that angel she will cave. Doubtful, but I will still try.

As much as I will try to "act my age" I don't think I will be able to pull off asking without a giggle fit.

Yeah so I'm not a writer

I'd like to think that I have some writing ability. The sad truth however is that I don't. I'm a horrible speller (I'm in deep debt to spell check). I don't know when to use a . or a , and I use way to many !!!!! So why I decide to write a blog I have no clue. But here I am doing it anyways. My only solace is that with 24,496,863 (ok so I made that number up) twilight blogs out there no one will ever stumble upon mine. Right? Also building a blog is not my thing. I really don't think it can be that hard but wouldn't the Cullens prefer the "pale on pale" (otherwise known as the standard layout) of a my blog? Ok I'm just lazy and apparently crazy. I think I'll just sit back and enjoy this ride.

BTY Happy 108th Birthday Edward Cullen!!!!

(see what I mean about crazy?)

Now I am going to go and order dinner, have a glass/bottle of wine and watch twilight a few times (the wife has to work tonight so I wont get any shit about it).

The first step

Hi my name is Audra and I have been dazzled.

I never wanted this to happen to me. I was just living my normal 26 year old life when *smack* Twilight hit me. When the movie came out my mom asked me if I had read the books. My answer: "Oh for fuck sake Mom I'm not a 16 year old who's all wet for that Twilight crap..". In truth I never knew Twilight was there at all.

My life was much simpler in those old days.

As many things go the seed was planted. I saw the movie, it was eh but still my heart started beating for Edward (much to my wife's dismay. Did I mention I'm a lesbian?). I did what a normal 20 something should do, I tried to bury the very wrong feelings I was having for a 17 year old vampire. Yeah like that was going to work.

Then came reasoning, "Only his body is 17 right? Would that hold up in court?"

I was doubtful. So I took the next logical step, I went out and bought the books (Maybe I wouldn't care for them. I could hope right?). Less than a week later (there was one 24 hour reading session in there) I had finished the series. That did it. I was wrong... so wrong. I was addicted. I started watching the movie multiple times a day, reading as many twilight blogs as I could find. I left the house less and less.

The wife wasn't happy.

I stopped cooking, "the economy will get better if people eat out more often. Lets do our part...".

I stopped cleaning "I'm not Martha fucking Stewart. You want clean clothes do some laundry".

Things were getting out of hand. The harder I tried to fight it, the more it pulled me in. I didn't have a chance, I'm not that strong of a person.

So I gave up.

So here I am 9 months later with no hope in sight. I have been pulled under by all things Twilight with no will to ever resurface.